More ranting

Bad bad day at work.

It's a long story involving me, another doctor, the medics and a patient with an anterior communicating artery aneurysm. Was told this morning by one of the nurses that that I'd better flee the country cos that "another doctor" was going to shoot my ass.

Considering it's day 7 of my 11-day stretch of non-stop work, I was already losing the plot and I really didn't need this to spoil the rest of the day. Nonetheless, being the anti-conflict person that I am, it's still floating about in my mind and I'm dreading tomorrow, when I'll probably have to face the "show down".

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I had the feeling it wasn't going to be a good day. Took a cab to work (cos the underground doesn't open till 10am on Sundays, and my sleep is too important for me to commence the hour-long trek to work at 7am). The cab driver turned up in his shiny white VW Passat all in good time. I got in and the conversation went:

Him: "So, you're on your way to work?"
Me: "Yup."
(Silence for a while)

Him: "You're a doctor, or?" (wonder why he didn't complete the question)
Me: "Yup, I'm a doctor."

Normally, at this point, the conversation could go one of 3 ways:
a) He could start telling me about his aunt or uncle or cousin who was admitted to hospital last year with "double pneumonia" and contracted MRSA, which killed him.

b) He could just move on to some other topic like the sort of stuff one must see in an inner city emergency department, or even something not medically related.

c) He could start trying to "get some medical advice".

Well, today's cabby decided on the third option. Normally, I don't have issues with people asking me for random bits of advice (even though I often haven't a clue what caused their strange rash or spot or lump). But I was tired and wishing I was anywhere else apart from in a cab on the way to work on a sunny sunday. The last thing I wanted was for work to start even earlier... Needless to say, I obliged him with advice about his "frozen shoulder", which basically, he already knew anyway cos his GP had been dealing with it.

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When bombshells are dropped early in the morning, your day is inevitably affected. I'm referring to the potential conflict, not the cabby. Plodded on through the rest of the day and was just so glad when it was all over.

But alas, tomorrow is d-day. Plus, I still have 2 days of 9-and-a-half hour shifts and another 2 days of 12-hour shifts to survive before I get a day off. Can't wait for friday. Then I wish that Monday would never come. Starting nights on Monday:(

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I'm glad Mr Laptop is working again. Just telling the world (or nobody) about all my frustrations is therapeutic.

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On days like these, I can't help but toy with the idea of a career change. What can I do? Any suggestions?

It is alive!

Poor Mr Laptop died last week (yup, very creative name I know.. and yes, I've decided laptop has to be male).

For some reason, the touch pad and some of the keys refused to work, no matter how I rebooted the system. Tried everything. Phoned knowledgable Uncle H for advice. But it just wouldn't work. In my desperation, I impulsively picked up my reformatting cds and wiped Mr Laptop's contents out. Still, even though I'd lost everything I had installed (heart-wrenching), he was still malfunctioning.

Had no more time to waste on willing him to work. Had more pressing things to do, like preparing for my interview. So I just left him there and tried to ignore him.

But you know what? 2 days ago, after the whole interview saga, I decided I would just switch him on, just to convince myself that Mr Laptop was truly very ill and that I would have to take him to a doctor.
Guess what? Touch pad suddenly worked. So... miracles do happen! All's not lost.

His brain is still pretty empty at the moment, but I'll start filling him up soon...

So I'm pleased that Mr Laptop is well, and I'll try to take better care of him from now on.

And I ramble on...

Why are my blog entries always so melancholic???

Really, I am a happier person than my entries would appear to portray. I guess it's down to the fact that when I have time to blog, I also have time to think... And when I have time to think, I tend to over-analyse everything.

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Back to work on Monday, so there'll be less of the thinking and the blogging.

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Oh yes, booked an interview for next week. I phoned up the A&E secretaries to let them know. The conversation went:

Me: "I'm just phoning to let you know that I have an interview to attend next Thurs."
Her: "What shift are you doing then?"
Me: "8am-6pm"
Her: "What time is the interview?"
Me: "1.30pm."
Her: "Do you need to travel?"
Me: "No, it's in Glasgow. Some hotel. Not exactly sure where."
Her: "Oh ok, so you won't be away the whole day then."
Me: "Erm, yah, I'll just have to leave about lunchtime."
Her: "I'm sure it'll be fine if you're away for an hour or so."
Me: "Ok, bye."

I sat there thinking... How on earth do you expect me to travel to an interview, wait for it, go through it and travel back to work in an hour?!?!
Argh... how tight can these people get???

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Addicted to Grey's anatomy. I'd watched all of season 2 last year. As an exam "incentive", I ordered season 1 on amazon the day after my part 2 exam.
Now that I've watched it all, I'm craving more! But season 3 isn't out on DVD yet and the clips on youtube are great, but just not quite enough. Anyone has season 3???

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Of warmth and chills

Sat in Kelvingrove Park this evening. The sun was shining, birds chirping, tulips in bloom...
I love sunny, yet slightly chilly days. The glorious sunshine lights up all of creation and you just feel so lifted. And as you take a deep breath, the chilly air creates a tingling sensation in your chest. I know it sounds strange, but the feeling of coldness makes you so much more aware of the warmth and the converse is just as true.

As I lay prone with my pen in hand, I made a diary entry. As always, I look back to the last time I'd written- it was exactly a month ago. Thoughts started to crowd my head. It certainly feels like more than a month has gone by. The last month was busy and hectic, both physically and emotionally. There have been moments of coldness and warmth, hope and disappointment, confusion and certainty.

Extremes. Extremes provide perspective.

I scribbled away. Then it started getting more chilly. The sun was going down, the warmth was disappearing and it was getting colder.
Some things in life are certain and predictable. The sun will always go down. It was time to pack up and take a slow stroll home.

I look up at the blue skies. Perhaps the sunshine will return in the morning. Perhaps.

The weather forecast says tomorrow will be cloudy and rainy. Why is it always cloudy and rainy in Glasgow and warm and sunny in London or Brighton or Wales or just about everywhere else?

Perhaps the sun might just peek through... Hope is a good thing, right?